In societies like Germany, where the age at first birth is continuously increasing, the risk of experiencing at least temporary blockage of the parenthood goal due to infertility is also increasing. For many of those who experience problems procreating, assisted reproductive technologies are nowadays a very apparent option and oftentimes the first choice. The experience of infertility but also of fertility treatment, however, is stressful for the couple, as a large body of research consistently shows.

In this paper we investigate whether the ability to imagine adoption, foster care and life without a(nother) child protects from stress caused by infertility and treatment experience. We use data from a self-administered prospective cohort study of infertile couples at the beginning of fertility treatment in Germany. The analysis sample consisted of 441 respondents at baseline and 142 one year later. Most women and men cannot imagine alternatives to fertility treatment. Adoption and/or foster care is preferred over life without a(nother) child. We find that those can imagine alternatives at the beginning of treatment are less stressed at baseline and during follow-up. We argue that openness to alternatives to fertility treatment can facilitate disengagement from the blocked goal and reengagement with other goals. This is especially important for those who experience infertility and refer to fertility treatment, because the chances to have the desired child are relatively low even with medical help.